Good Day Jungle fans. I have just been on the phone with Ant and Dec, and they have been telling me that the Jungle drums are beating with words of a conspiracy.
Who was the second gunman on the grassy knoll? Did they ever really go to the moon? Are the royals really reptilian lizards that shake off there human disguises after a long day fox hunting in Balmoral. Inquiring minds want to know?
Firstly, our Martina is still there. Loving her. Lets face it after going head to head with Steffi Graf, she could do anything.
I got a text the other day from a random woman called Ingrid. This enigmatic text said this. " My money is on Martina to win, she's been eating bush tucker for years".......Ingrid, in bad taste, but somewhat mildly amusing. Please leave you re jungle jokes on the comments section underneath. The winner will receive a kangaroo willy, 12 grub worms and a thoroughly good thrashing from Martina!
So Brian has left and he confesses it was all too much. He managed to restore peace and harmony to the village and could walk away a happy man. I think we should award him the Nobel Peace Prize for such valiant work. Brian......I salute you!!
I was sad to see Esther go the woman is iconic! I remember that dog that talked on her show....you know the dog that said sausages, and recited Shakespearean poetry whilst smoking a pipe in a dinner jacket. Esther we all salute you! I laughed at her asking Nicole for sex, well intimating that. Nicole would have Esther for breakfast. Death by mammary ( not a bad way to go)
David has sparked an Orwellian conspiracy at jungle domination. He has been trying to get Nicole onside. I doubt whether the man from Dollar could get any kind of domination. Its not really a conspiracy is it, need something moire juicy to quantify it as a full blown conspiracy.
Like Ant and Dec really work for the CIA, and have bugged the camp under the guise of a TV show, in order to get confessions from the Celebs as to where they are keeping the Ark of the Covenant. I reckon Nicole is hiding it in her cleavage, along with all the lost socks in the world and my bloody TV remote!
Until later I bid you farewell, but will leave you with this Chinese proverb. He who scratches arse at night, wakes with smelly finger......that's for you Timmy!
BBBL
