Miss Gay UK: Interview with Leah McCullough.

I have been thinking about the universe in the last couple of days. The ebb and flow of human nature, the push and pull of our disquieted lives and came to the following conclusion.

Living in Provence with Nigella would certainly have it pitfalls. I mean yes to wake up alongside the culinary Adonis would be a bonus, but then what if this dream were in fact not what we expect or want it to be?? Maybe Yvette Fielding is more my type?

I mean knocking about an old castle at 3am waiting to be possessed by the ghost of Gwendolyn; a 13th century whore is far more appealing. I offer myself up to be possessed, with Yvette mopping my fevered brow….all she would have to do would be to ditch that full length puffer jacket! I have a phobia of puffer jackets.

Anyway, back to reality and a rather endearing interview with Leah McCullough from Belfast. I am partial to a Northern Irish accent; it could melt me like butter in the slap of a word. Being 32, Leah feels that she has wisdom to share. She also could possibly be a Romany Gypsy in a past incarnation, who we can affectionately call Gypsy Rose Leah.

MGUBL: “Why did you enter Miss Gay UK?”


LEAH: “I saw a poster and I thought I can be Miss Gay UK, it’s like a gay Miss Congeniality, and I love that movie. I was G+T’d up and I thought well I’m gay and I’m from the UK so I’m qualified to enter”

At this point I am all ready smitten with her accent! It is charming.


MGUBL: “What venue was it held at?”


LEAH: “It was held in Belfast at a pub called DuBarry’s. There were 14 contestants and it was a right laugh. We all laughed at lot. I was the granny of the bunch, you know being 32, but I thought ah well I’ve a brass neck on me, so go for it”

For all of us not aware with the Irish colloquialism 'a Brass Neck On me' it means…..she’s got a really big pair of bollocks and isn’t afraid to use em…


MGUBL: “Can you make homemade soda bread?”

LEAH: “Oh my god I can, I fucking can. I make potato bread actually, and I have a couple of secret weapons that I put in there. My friends are banging on my door on a Saturday to get there hands on my bread!”

(My friends are banging on the door to get there hands on my baps, but that’s another story)

MGUBL: “What would you do if you won Miss Gay UK…and how would it change you?”


LEAH: “I don’t think anything could change me, good luck with that (laughs). I think it would enhance my life and my personality, and open doors for me. If I did win I would use my wisdom and make the word lesbian more acceptable. I’d do it with integrity and a pinch of style.”

MGUBL: “How’s the gay scene over in Ireland?”

LEAH: “Improving and we have to thank the older lesbians for that. They have nurtured the gay scene and we can now reap the benefits. The lesbians who are now in there 40’s and 50’s are the ones to thank. Having said that there are no women only bars in Belfast, DuBarrys welcome lesbians with open arms though”.

MGUBL: “I’ve heard that the Irish make fantastic lovers. Can you confirm or deny these allegations?”


LEAH: (Laughs,) “I can neither confirm nor deny, but of course, I can confirm that my fiancé of almost 8 years is fantastic.”

MGUBL: “Have you ever met the Nolan’s?”

LEAH: “Oh my god, yes, I swear to fuck I met Bernie. She was in a pub and had been on loose women talking about giving up smoking, and there she was smoking like 40 tabs one after the other. We went up and said it is cool to see you and you are a liar. She was lovely spent time talking to us.”


MGUBL: “Who would be your ideal woman to have a date with?”

LEAH: “Okay this is fantasy date right? Then it would have to be Annie Lennox. She is strong and can belt out a tune. I’d cook and clean for her (laughs) the word cool doesn’t even come close to encapsulating who she is.”

MGUBL: “What do you think the lesbian community needs to change?”

LEAH: “In think it’s a bit of an inner circle, very insular. I can accuse myself of the same thing. Its small community but needs to be more vocal. We need to gay up the world, so that in future generations it will be more acceptable. I have brilliant family who are really proud of who I am.”

MGUBL: “James Joyce or WB Yeats?”

LEAH: “Oh you’re an evil woman. I am going to have to say both. Make a poet sandwich of them both.”

MGUBL: “Do you have any phobias?”

LEAH: “Oh my god how long have you got? Cockroaches and flying cockroaches. Oh and brass bands, I literally crumple into a heap when I hear a brass band…crawling I am on hands and knees. Yes and Swing chairs at the funfair, there’s something so wrong about those!”

I thought my list of phobias was extensive!

MGUBL: “What will be you’re killer tactic for the final?”

LEAH: “I’m going to try and make everyone laugh. I love to see people laughing. I am a right idiot I must say. Therefore, if I make people laugh then I have achieved something. I’ve got twenty friends coming over with me, and they are loud, so you will definitely hear them.”

MGUBL: “If you won what would you do with you’re title?”

LEAH: “I would promote myself and big up my profile so I could make a positive change to gay people. My girlfriend had a dream that I ended up on the L Word, but I wasn’t allowed to kiss Shane or Pappi.”

Am I the only lesbian on the planet who just does not get the Shane thing? I mean she looks like my nephew for Christ’s sake!

MGUBL: “Choose between Winona Ryder and Julia Roberts?”

LEAH: “Julia Roberts If I had to. I mean Winona ruined little women for me, it was all so wrong, and then the whole shoplifting scandal, so Julia. But don’t you think Julia Roberts has too many teeth, she has like 30 teeth on the top set alone!”

At this point, I tell Leah that I own a free Winona t-shirt and that I might have to bring it to Birmingham. Winona was not shoplifting exactly, but the Percadin had made her forget to pay for the luxury items….can happen to us all!

MGUBL: “What would you have been in a past life?”

LEAH: “Oh god, I’m all into this stuff. I think I was definitely a Romany Gypsy. I often get a sense of Déjà vu. I often get a sense of Déjà vu. So definitely a Romany Gypsy”

My warm thanks go out to Leah, who had me in stitches. I am looking forward to meeting the gang of twenty Irish women in Birmingham. They are also going to buy me tequila! I have ordered the ambulance and stomach pump in advance.

Please support Miss Gay UK anyway, you can.

http://www.missgayuk.co.uk/